What not to say to someone struggling with fertility


As much as the process of reproduction is rooted in science, there is a lot of luck at play as well. While in some cases, there can be some apparent reasons for the fertility issues, but there are couples who suffer from unexplained infertility.

Moreover, the world of fertility and conversely, infertility, is rather complex. At times, it is the female anatomy that is failing to deliver as usual.

In other times, it may be due to sperm issues include mobility, motility, and count problems. However, it may also be the case that both the partners are facing issues, hence, the compounded problem of infertility.

However, it is important to know that just because the couple has not managed to get pregnant for some months is it necessarily because of infertility; you need to get an evaluation by the Gynecologist in Lahore to consider it to be a case of fertility problems, rather than just some other things you might be doing wrong.

Facing infertility

No matter if you have infertility or if you are struggling with fertility, it can be very difficult to deal with. The emotional toll that it takes is great, and in midst of all this, if you have callous statements from your loved ones, it is completely heart breaking.

Hence, knowing what to say and what not to say is vital when discussing this sensitive issue with your friend.

What not to say to someone facing infertility or trouble conceiving

Trivializing their pain

The worst thing that you can do to a person in pain is by trivializing their problem. Telling them their life is amazing as it is, children are not all that fun, how demanding children can be are not at all helpful.

People need your support, and this is an anti-thesis of support.

Make your peace with your destiny

Another wrong thing to say is that you must make your peace with your destiny, and there must be some reason for it. While you might be coming from a good place, but your wording might come off as callous.

Tell them to relax

When you are stressed, in midst of a terrible situation, are trying to get some semblance of life, being told you need to relax is perhaps the worst advice. You know you should relax, but you also don’t know how to relax!

So, if you tell someone to relax when they are obviously struggling with the emotion themselves, they will see red, and they are not to be blamed for them.

You should adopt; it will help the baby find a home as well

There are very different issues with this suggestion as well. You are ending all their hope by suggesting them a last resort of adoption. Moreover, you are simplifying a procedure that is extremely complicated; adoption is marked by a lot of red tape, requires money, and does not always result in the couple being able to get a baby.

Get IVF done

Well, most people these days are well-versed in the techniques pertaining to fertility. Thanks to the pervasiveness of internet, getting information is merely a click away.

So, when you try to school and teach people to just get on with IVF, you are being insensitive, and then some. They know what fertility treatment options are there, thank you very much.

Similarly, IVF is not an easy procedure. It takes a great toll on your body, mind, and finances. When you tell people that’s the only option, you downplay the toll of IVF, alongside killing their hope of natural conception.

Conversely, you also make them associate extra hope with IVF, it does not have an efficacy of 100%, so it may be that even that is not a viable option for a couple.

So, let the Gynecologist in Karachi handle all the treatment aspect of the matter. You just provide support, rather than dispensing unsolicited advice.

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